Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Happy Birthday, Mama DB!

Yesterday I did a post about friendship.

Today is the birthday of one of my closest friends. Happy Birthday, Mama DB!

She is an awesome mom of two incredible kids, a loving wife to a lovable guy, and an amazing photographer. So, to show her the proper respect and to honor a fellow stay-at-home mom, I will now relate to my mom "Hi MOM!" the masses a funny story about her.

About 1 year ago, she and I got it into our heads that in order to help encourage us to cook for our finiky children, we should do family-style meals together. The idea would be that the children would help encourage each other to eat, but what ended up happening was a bunch of tag teaming and yelling for children to "stop acting like the food was poison!"

Most of the time the food wasn't.

However, there was an instance where Mama DB and I decided that we really needed our own reality show called, "How NOT To Cook".

I had frozen chicken tenders that I was planning to cook this particular evening that Mama DB and her family joined us. We were going to douse these chicken pieces in yellow curry sauce, and throw in a side veggie dish and starch dish and you have yourself a banquet!

Well, when it was about 30 minutes before dinner was to be eaten, Mama DB asked me if I had defrosted the chicken. I said, "No, I always cook them from frozen." She looked at the time, and then she looked at me and said nothing.

Elapsed time: 25 minutes

Chicken was cooking on the stove top. Everything else was ready except for the chicken, which was (admittedly) getting a little burnt on the outside and was still raw and partially frozen on the inside. Mama DB peered over my shoulder and said... nothing. I was still poking the chicken hoping that it would miraculously change from being a disease-infested dish to a delicious work of art. But... barring the use of illegal drugs to impair our judgement, that WASN'T going to happen.

Total elapsed time: 35 minutes

Mama DB sees the frozen chicken on the pan, and she suggests, "How about we boil it?" Desperate for something that would salvage the chicken, I say SURE! I take a big step back and leave my chicken in the capable hands of my friend with ample boiling experience.

Total elapsed time: 45 minutes

The chicken had finished boiling and was in fact cooked all the way through. We then looked at it...

I poked it...

The consistancy was inexplicable. It is like touching one of those fake chickens they use for comedy routines. Yes, RUBBER! It felt like a rubber chicken. I have finally discovered how they make those!

But, I wasn't going to say anything about it. Mama DB had saved my dinner!

Except, no amount of cooking or yellow curry sauce could save the rubber chicken. It was too... weird. I don't know how else to describe it.

Huh... after reading this story, I realize this is more about my cooking ineptitude rather than a funny story about Mama DB. Well, Mama! That's what friends are for. Happy Birthday!


Mama DB said...

Aww, thanks for the well wishes.

And I'm still laughing,

"The consistancy was inexplicable."

That was the rubberiest chicken I've ever stuck a fork in, ever. But I'm half English. It is in my blood to want to boil all food.

Where do you get your poking food constantly from? ;)

Love you.

Tiffany T said...

In my defense, I think I get the poking from my mother. It is our family's equivalent to kicking the tire of a car. We are hoping that poking the food will cause it to be fixed.

gingela5 said...

Happy birthday to MamaDB...chicken can go all sorts of bad so easily! I hope she has a wonderful day!

Anonymous said...

What do you mean you got it from your Mom!? Ok...well my last frozen chicken outing did stay raw way past the allotted time..the pizza was good though. Ok, so maybe it is genetic. Next time just put it in with a few frozen raviolis underneath and cover with Newman's Family Italian dressing...give it at least 45 minutes...or until done...lol.

DJ said...

That's a very funny story! Can't say that I've ever boiled chicken, myself, but I have ruined plenty of meals. :) Happy Birthday to Mama DB!