There is an e-mail being circulated by my friends and family that highlight some funny answers 2nd graders gave when asked questions regarding their moms. Now, I am a skeptic. I have no doubt that these were the answers that some 2nd graders gave, but I can't help but dilute the joyous answers by asking my own questions like: 'who is this child', 'how was the test administered', and 'how much coaching did Mom and Dad do'.
Yes, I agree I need to rest my brain and just enjoy the intention of the e-mail. I'm working on it. To help me, I decided to ask my 6-year old LittleMan these questions. I was curious to hear what he had to say.
I asked these questions (with no threat of punishment if he should say something I don't like) to LittleMan, and I wrote exactly what he said - eliminating the "um"s and "uh"s. I told him there were no right answers, and that I would not think him silly or stupid for any answer he gave. These questions were for fun. I offered no prompting, and I sat staring at my laptop until he came up with an answer that I typed. He smiled at me a time or two to see if I would react to an answer. I did not. I merely said, "Thanks, sweetie", after the last question was answered.
Here is how it went...
1. Why did God make mothers?
LittleMan - "To take care of children"
2. How did God make mothers?
LittleMan - "I only want to give one answer. Maybe he gives hearts as blood."
Note: I have no idea what other answers he had swirling around his head.
3. What ingredience are mothers made out of?
LittleMan - "Blood... and brain."
4. Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
LittleMan - "God really had to pick who is nice and not a mean one. You were one of the nice ones."
5. What kind of little girl was your Mom?
LittleMan - "Like my sister. She loves cheese."
6. What did Mom need to know about Dad before she married him?
LittleMan - "How to behave at him, and he had to learn to be almost like a mom... but not quite."
Note: ?!?!?!?!?! I almost broke my vow to be impartial to ask him what he meant. I still haven't asked LittleMan. It seems better off unexplained.
7. Why did your Mom marry your Dad?
LittleMan - "He was nice to you, and you loved each other and liked each other... and all that stuff."
8. Who is the boss at your house?
LittleMan - "You. Mom and Dad."
9. What is the difference between moms and dads?
LittleMan - "Mom has long hair, and Dad has short hair. Mom has different socks than Dad."
10. What does Mom do in her spare time?
LittleMan - "What is spare?"
Me - "What do I do when you are at school?"
LittleMan - "Wash the dishes and do the laundry."
11. What would it take for your Mom to be perfect?
LittleMan - "Have lots of brains"
Note: Oh, man that's funny. Either my son is saying that I'm not the brightest bulb in the lot, or he thinks it takes a lot of intelligence to be perfect. Whatever - both answers are funny.
12. If you could change one thing about your Mom what would it be?
LittleMan - "Make the house more clean."
Note: Brutal! Out of the mouth of babes...